How comfortable are you and your partner?


If you are anything like me then you may be obsessed with Grey’s Anatomy. In the new season of Grey’s, because Christina Yang is no longer on the show, Alex is Meredith’s new person. And Meredith is having a hell of a season. So, in typical Meredith form she’s been in bed and in the shower with Alex venting her problems. So much so that Jo is having a major issue with this. I really want to say I get it, part of me does but not really.

This post comes from a brief conversation me and my good girlfriend had. We’ve had this conversation before and we always agree to disagree. Now, I’m not sure if it is important to note that she’s heterosexual but someone may find that piece of information useful.

My best friend and I are extremely close. People usually speculate that we are either twins or lovers before they finally settle on the fact that we are just very close best friends. People usually speculate that we’ve slept together. That’s not true, of course, but usually no one believes that. We share an apartment and we do the things that best friends do, eat dinner together, lounge in bed together, sit on the sofa together, normal things. If I’m in the shower or tub she’ll come to the door to speak if she needs to or even sit on the edge of the toilet. Same thing that Meredith and Alex do but of course they are male and female.

I’m not sure our relationship would be much different if we were opposite sex best friends. But we are both feminine lesbians and we both have girlfriends. And our girlfriends have joined our family. And what I mean by that is we are a package deal. We are a village. When we date, we usually tell them up from that we are a package deal. We get everyone together and have dinner or breakfast at our house. And we may all cram into someone’s bed and watch a movie. It’s not uncommon for me to get in bed with my best friend and her girlfriend and vice versa. In fact. I will text my best friend verbatim,” come get in bed with us.” I don’t have a fear that my best friend will creep behind my back with my girlfriend and vice versa.

Now, according to my good girlfriend this is a special case. She wouldn’t be comfortable with her man sharing the type of friendship Alex and Meredith have and she damn sure wouldn’t have her friends cuddled up in bed with her and her man. And I respect that. But she stated that maybe the gay community is different. And I’m not sure if they are or if my little family is a special case. We aren’t exchange our partners in any sexual manner but we may all cram in bed to watch a movie and I don’t see anything wrong with that. Nor do I see anything wrong with the level of closeness my best friend and I share.

But I realize that this maybe different for other people. I realize everyone you think may be your friend may feel quite different behind your back. So, how comfortable are you and your partner with your friends ?

I also want to say, this is only a relationship I share with my best friend. Certainly I’m not welcoming anyone to cuddle up with me and my girlfriend on a whim and not because it’s inappropriate but because I don’t just welcome guests into my bed lol. I do have a seating area.

Until next time…


5 thoughts on “How comfortable are you and your partner?

  1. I can completely understand you and your best friend’s relationship; I have the same with mine. I always let current and future girlfriends know that I would not ‘give’ up my best friend because she’s been here before and probably after you (in the off chance we break up)…I find it refreshing that your girlfriend doesn’t have a problem with the relationship you and your best friend have…its hard to find someone secure in themselves and you that they won’t think that you’re sleeping with any and everyone.

      1. I want to say that I would be okay with it, but I’m not entirely sure. I think I would have to actually be in that type of situation for me to actually understand what its like to be on the other side.

      2. The only reason i ask is because my bff asked me. And i said IF this was the nature of my partner and her bffs relationship from the beginning i would be fine. But because its not then and only then would i have a problem.

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